Bachelor 2013 Week 3: Can This Guy Exercise With a Shirt On?

1:1 with Leslie M

• “How long will this love last?”  Well, given the success of previous seasons, it’s a toss-up between 3 days and a Kardashian marriage
• Chris Harrison:  “Is this the most bizarre thing you have seen”. Random person: “Yes”.  And this is in front of the museum which hosts the record for the most people dressed as Smurfs
• In 5 years people will read this in the Guinness Book of world records and say “Who?”
• “I loved High School”.  OK, she must have been a bully.
• Yeah Leslie, sure you were a nerd.  Sean should quiz her.  “OK, what is ComicCon?”
• “Do you think you could develop feelings for me in this setting?”.  Really Sean, what do you think she was going to say?  “Ah, not really, but I really want that rose because it gives me a better chance of being invited onto the cast of the bachelor pad”…I mean, “Yes, of course I already am”

Group Date:

• “This volleyball game is the most important game of my life” – wow, think the monopoly game I played as a 10 year old during family game night was more important
• Hey girl with the bandana…don’t you know that crying and desperation don’t go well together
• “Sean has all the qualities I want in a husband…you know blonde…and uh…did I say blonde?”
• It’s too dark, I can’t see who that girl is talking to Sean on the beach…then I realize, what does it matter, it’s all the same
• Sean to a girl he just met “I can tell you have a genuine heart”.  Really Sean, how can you tell? Is it because she doesn’t have one of those dastardly mustaches that those old west criminals had that gave away their un-genuine hearts?
• Complaining about other girls?  Yeah, that has gone over well in previous seasons

1:1 Date Ashlee

• Tierra takes a fall and all the camera men are standing around and the producers yell ”Don’t touch her yet!!!…Wait till the bachelor comes in”
• Seriously, a neck brace?  My 3 year old would have gotten up from that fall & complained less #Bachelor
• You would have thought that another girl hit her on the back of the head with a chair WWE style with the way ABC previewed “the fall”
• I bet those 2 girls were like “Damn, the last 2 kids who had their wishes granted were adopted by Angelina and Brad”
• The Eli Young band?  Who the hell is that?
• Hey Sean, those girls said they are bachelor fans.  Maybe you should dance with one of them instead of Ashlee for at least one song?
• Wait, did Eli Young follow them on their date?

Rose Ceremony

• Sarah’s like “crap, now I have to pretend that I actually like this dog”
• Just an FYI Sarah, contrary to what you said, Sean did not coordinate you seeing your dog, the producers did.  Sean was too busy kissing Leslie for over 3 minutes
• With all the girls stealing Sean back and forth, I would just say ”you know what, you guys talk to each other and I am going to hang out with the dog”